"I used to be so ambitious."

The conversation living rent-free in my mind.

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about a chat I had with two of my closest friends since my 10-year business school reunion.

I’ll skip the personal details to preserve their anonymity, but both are senior leaders in their companies and could easily be in the C-Suite within the next decade if they wanted. I respect them immensely!

Both are ambitious and have worked incredibly hard to establish themselves. They have the authority, influence and promotions to show for it.

Here was the crux of our conversation:

“I’m good.”

Meaning, they’re content with their current leadership levels.

They want to continue to advance, but they’re not gunning for the C-Suite with the same singular focus and hustle that define the first ten years of their career.

They can see the perks that come with the C-Suite, but also the constant fire drills, pressure and claims on their time and attention.

They’re not going to say no to a promotion, but instead of sprinting towards it, they’re starting to make intentional shifts - being more discerning about what they say yes to, executing their day-to-day while removing themselves from special (extra credit) initiatives.

These shifts are giving them more space and energy for other facets of their lives. Instead of measuring success in speed (time to promotion), they want to enjoy the journey along the way.

Their ambition has evolved.

The same happened for me in my mid-thirties.

I graduated from business school with tons of unbridled ambition – I’m not sure I could have even defined what my “ambition” was or what I was gunning for, but I just knew I wanted to advance as quickly as possible.

I worked so hard for my first promotion to engagement manager - clocking it in just twenty months - and was so proud of myself once I got it.

And then, because it was the only way I was wired, I continued to work hard and was promoted 3x in five years, landing as a c-suite leader at my company, leading a team of seven and overseeing the engagement and well-being of our firm of 70.

Honestly, that wasn’t even part of my initial post-business school ambition. I perhaps over-shot a bit.

As I was in my leadership role, I started gradually pulling back.

It helped that there was no next promotion to gun for, but I just couldn’t shake the desire to have more of a life outside of work.

I had felt like a grayed-out 2-D work bot for years - work, exercise, sleep, repeat - and wanted to feel full and multi-dimensional. To finally have an answer to “what do you do for fun?”

So I signed off at 6:30pm instead of 7:45pm (ha!). Carved out time to complete coach training. Had dinner with friends during the work week (impossible in my previous consulting years!).

I delivered well, but didn’t over-deliver.

Instead of striving for more accolades and a hearty bonus, I was doing meaningful work, but also living a meaningful life.

And, ultimately left so I could scale my coaching business.

My ambition evolved.

My personal definition of ambition now is nuanced - I want to impact a ton of women, build a significant business with a recognized brand that exceeds my corporate income while not working exhaustively.

But it can summed up as:

I want to do meaningful work, while having a meaningful life.

And here’s why I’m writing this newsletter:

So many of my clients come to me thinking something is wrong with them.

I can’t count how many client inquiry forms I’ve received have included some version of, “I used to be so ambitious” and share a fear that something is wrong and a desire to reignite that ambition.

In their late-20s and early-30s, charging out of grad school, these women had so much internal drive to work insanely hard and felt engaged and motivated as that hard work was recognized.

Feel familiar?

But then at some point in their 30s - early, mid or late, it’s different for everyone - they start to lose that internal fire that fueled their exhaustive work. They began to wonder what it’d be like to volunteer, take an art class or spend more time at the playground with their kids.

As I dig in with these clients and define their Operating Principles, or the values, priorities and anchors that matter most to them, we quickly realize (and clarify!):

Nothing is wrong with them.

They haven’t lost their ambition. It has evolved.

Instead of being solely motivated by the next promotion and prioritizing career over all else, they want to be multi-faceted 3-D humans with varied interests, passions and robust relationships.

They’re still wildly ambitious.

But in this current chapter of their lives, they define that as:

Doing meaningful work while living a meaningful life.

Perhaps, you’ve been feeling the same - as my clients, dear friends and me - and missing that internal spark, wondering where that clear, hard-charging vision for your career went and feeling a soft, yet, persistent desire for something more.

Remember, nothing is wrong.

You are evolving.

---

P.S., If you’re ready to reshape your career so it actually reflects who you are now - and the future you want to build - I’ve been stealthily building something new I’m so proud of: “Ambition Reimagined.”

This is a flexible and high-impact group coaching program for ambitious millennial women done swirling on “what’s next?!” and ready to make grounded, strategic career moves - rooted in deep self-awareness, a clear long-term vision and the support of a like-minded community.

Honestly, this might be the best thing I’ve ever built. The program is shaped by hundreds of hours of coaching, real client results (4 clients landed new jobs recently!), and designed to help you define your own version of meaningful work and a meaningful life - with the right expert guidance, proven tools and community.

I’m running a Beta cohort at a special founder’s rate - and I’d love for you to be part of it. Two spots have already been claimed so if you feel called to join, click [here] to learn more and apply today.

P.P.S., I drafted this email last week and was scooped by the New York Times! I was thrilled to see this conversation amplified by the NYT in their article, “From Girl Boss to No Boss.” While the article primarily focuses on women who have left traditional corporate tracks to start their own ventures, their experiences and motivations will feel similar. All of our ambitions are evolving!